Do you know when to walk away?
This is something that has had me thinking for the last half hour. It’s my Greys Anatomy quote of the week, the line which most struck a chord for me.
‘Do you know when to walk away?’
This got me thinking, not your average everyday kind of thinking ofcourse, but deep and meaningful thinking. Do I know when to walk away?
I wish I could answer that one for myself, I really do. I’m good at asking the questions when they’re aimed at other people, but am I good at answering them for myself? Am I capable of answering a question like that without returning another question to ponder? Thats a tough one for this chick.
Back to the original line of thought. Do you know when to walk away? It’s similar to letting go, we all know that sometimes in our lives things suddenly change. Sometimes for the better, and sometimes unexpectedly. But sooner or later we face the reality of the situation and we deal with it, front up and face it once and for all. Thats the turning point, the point of no return, the crossroads. Thats the acceptance of an end, the realisation that it is time to let go. It’s the willingness to open a new beginning, whatever that may be for the situation at hand.
Can we force ourselves to be ready to make that happen, to accept change and move on, go forwards? Short answer, no. It will happen to each of us when the time is right, there’s nothing that we can to do to bring it on quicker than what it is taking. Really? Theres nothing that we can do to heal? Wow.I contradicted myself there, and said something which goes against what I believe. There is plenty that we can do for ourselves in the form of self help to shift our inner being, our spirit. There is plenty that we can do to grow, to better our thought patterns, to improve our ways of processing information, our self worth, our capabilities.
Can we force other people then to make that change? To take that step forwards? No. We can offer advice, we can offer shoulders, we can offer ears. We cannot push somebody into a new direction that they are not ready to take, we cannot guide them there either. We can walk beside them if they want us to, we can even hold their hands along the way if they want us to. But it has got to be their choice and their choice alone, we cannot interfere with their steps or process patterns or the time it takes for them to get there. They will get there in the end, but only they know when the end starts. And yes, an end is a start, it is the beginning of something new. To come to an end we must see a way out, and the way out is the way to move on, and to move on is to start again. And that is a beginning.
Why am I stuck on this then? I am stuck because I’m unsure whether I should be walking away. I had a conversation with my friend Leo today and she threw some very insightful questions at me. (She is very wise.) She asked me why I can’t let go. Admittedly I did say that to somebody today, and it has been bugging me ever since. I’ve been telling the other person to let go, move forwards etc, and Leo pointed out to me that I am holding on. I should let go. Holding on will hurt. I am all for letting go, so why am I not doing it this time? What am I holding onto and why am I holding onto it? Is it worth the hurt of holding onto? If I let go is there a possibility that it could come back to me?
When I was younger I had a poster on my bedroom wall and I kept it there for years, wherever I lived I took it with me.
It had a picture of a white dove flying in the sky, which to me represented freedom. The words on the poster read: If you love something set it free. If it comes back to you it is yours, If it doesn’t it never was.
I may not know when to walk away, but I do know when I need to run.
10
Feb
??? I always thought it was:
“If you love something set it free. If it comes back to you it’s yours. If it doesn’t, hunt it down and kill it”
I’m glad… oh so glad that some of my psycho ex’s never lived by THAT one
Thats crazy! I have never heard that version of it before, never.
I dont think that the object of love is a person though, I think it is more the idealism of what could be, its more to do with letting go of hopes and dreams to see if they eventuate into reality or not. Well thats my take on it anyway, could mean something entirely different to the next person.