Hey they TGM’ers I notice not much is being said so I thought I would start my own semi regular thing a maa bob:
Larry Visits.
In todays installment, Larry Visits…A brothel!.
Well first off I had to try find my way in, sure the sign out the front in big enough for all to read but have you actually tried going through a brothel entrance? Its dark as (so the naughty pervs who visit such places can try and hide there identity) and I trip on the steps. Wow not even in the door and im already bleeding….
Well im finally at the door, and theres a guy standing there, He gets a fright as he has been concentrating so hard for the last 10 mins to pluck up the courage to actually enter, that he didnt notice me tripping or climbing the steps.
So after he finally goes In and I stand around for 10 min trying to pluck up the courage to actually go in my self, I open the door and am greeted at the front desk by one ugly looking dude. Immediatley I think ive made a mistake and entered a gay sauna but the ugly as dude says “$50 for a half hour $100 for an hour, pay first than you can go thru to the parlour to meet the ladies” and I feel re-ass-sured as I slam down my hard earned cash and strut on through to the parlour.
The first thing I notice when I enter the parlour is the cheap as decorations, damn they get payed $100 an hour and all they come up with is some lame paintings, grotty old seats and sofa, and carpet from the 70′s? man I would thought it would be flash for $100 an hour! thats like $84 a hour more than I earn!. LAME!.
Anywho I chuckle to myself as the “ladies of the night” all bid for my attention. I notice there isnt much middle room in the way of ages here, they all seem to be either 18-25 or 35-alot older years of age. Looks like im outta luck on my quest for a 25-35 year old. But hey Im a begger not a chooser so after being called cute, sexy, a big man, hot stuff and about 5 other things nobody else in there right mind would call me, I decided to go with the young looking, dark skinned, brown eyed (times 3), big boobed, round butted girly girl who calls herself “Angel”. Just as she is about to lead me to one of those dark and dirty looking back rooms another worker grabs my attention with “hey darling would you like Me and Angel to tag team you?” My heart skips a beat. Wow could this be it? is it really going to happen? are we going to go out the back and find a wrestling ring and wrestle a tag-team match????? oh no we are not going to see that, as it turns out she means a 3some and it means double the price…$200 a hour and still this crappy decor?.
Anywho Angel (if that is her real name) drags me off to a room where there are piles of sheets, towels and several boxes of condoms. Wow how sexy and inviting. Kinda like taking a romantic holiday to Patea…
She asks me “why did you pick me?” I reply “because you look the most likely of the lot to have Crabs.” She snaps back “Crabs? You actually want a girl with Crabs?” “yes” is my short, sharp and straight to the point answer. “why do you want a girl with Crabs for?” she asks “well…” I reply “I want a girl with Crabs because she will give them to me, i will give them to the neighbour, she will give them to postman and thats the prick I want to get for throwing this mornings paper in a giant puddle!”. 2 minutes later (which inlcludes the time it takes to get undressed and dressed again) Ive got my crabs, a silly grin on my face and $100 less to spend. A great time had by all, and by all I mean me.
Tune in next time as Larry pays a visit to…your mother.
Laz Out
At Ease.
ROFL – a great rework of an old joke. You have a gift
that my friend is fucking genius….i cried i laughed so hard!
I hope you got something for the crabs for when you finish gifting them to others.
Looking forward to the next installment.
Its good bren isnt paying attention, im awaiting the wrath of the TGM censor!.
And yes baldrick, I took them to the beach and sent them back to the ocean